Your Needs are Calling You; They Want Your Attention

Women go through different chapters in their lives. One chapter may be focused on career, advancement in a career or transitioning from one career to another. Another chapter may focus on raising children; another one may be about caring for grandchildren. There may be a chapter or two on romance. Downsizing is a big chapter in people’s lives as is retirement. Unexpected things happen in life. A woman can find herself suddenly facing her life alone upon the loss of her beloved.

Life changes; needs change. It’s sometimes hard to keep up.

Needs have a way of speaking to us but we can’t always hear their messages clearly.

It takes a commitment to learn to listen for them. It’s important to check in with yourself. Are you yearning for something in this current chapter of life? Are you feeling a longing, a craving, or a desire for something? Do you have an urge, a hunger or an ache to achieve something that has seemed illusive?

I’m not a life coach, but I am a wardrobe coach. As a wardrobe coach I make it my goal to listen closely to what women want. I hear lots of examples of unmet needs. Sometimes women have had the same ones for decades.

Here are some of the things women have told me they want.

I want to be noticed.

I want to be appreciated for my talents.

I want to be visible.

I want to feel attractive.

I want to feel optimistic about getting older.

I want to be respected.

I want feel confident about how I present myself.

I want to understand myself so I can put my best self forward.

As women, we often famously give up on our own needs and rush in to help others take care of their needs. This action is not sustainable!

One of the most gratifying things about being an image coach is having the privilege of helping women focus on themselves. With my tools that include understanding the meaning of clothes, putting looks together for people to match their lifestyle and goals, using clothes and accessories to help tell the stories of the current chapter women are living in, I can help women meet those very core needs.

I bet this conversation is stirring up some unmet needs that you have. The most important first step is to hear them. Once they’re clear to you, you can take action to meet those needs.

 

Let me give you a few exercises that may help you clarify what you need right now.

Gently answer these probing questions or open-ended statements with the first things that come to you.

1. If I could make life more manageable day-to-day, I’d have (fill in the blank).

2. If I was being kind to myself, this is what I’d do to take better care of myself this month. (Start making your list.)

3. To be fully engaged in my life, I need (fill in the blank.)

4. I see other people doing this and I’d like to do it too. (Make your list.)

Some of the things I hear from women when I ask them these questions may resonate with you, too. See if you can relate to some of these statements.

1. Life would be more manageable if I was free of clutter.

2. I see other people having fun with clothes and I want that experience, too!

3. To be fully engaged with life I’d have ready to go outfits for the different activities I participate in a month’s time.

4. If I was being kind to myself I’d stop beating myself up and hire someone to help me achieve my goals. I don’t want to struggle any more.

Although you’ve experienced many chapters in your life already, there’s still so much that’s ahead of you. Be kind to yourself. Listen to your needs. You deserve to feel whole and complete.

You might be surprised to learn how much can be accomplished by spending some time and attention clarifying what you want and then creating a plan to get there. I’d be happy to be your partner in this project. You deserve to be listened to and to move forward in your life with grace and ease. If not now, when?